Output: A cat-sized mammalian creature with the body and wings of a bat and the eyes, proboscis, antennae, and wing-scales of a moth. Very intelligent and friendly.

Input: A sea urchin.
Setting: Very fine.

Output: A large, aggressive urchin-like animal that killed 2 D-Class before spontaneously crystallizing.
Intake Booth: 1 D-Class, 1 jellyfish, and SCP-049 on very fine.

Output: SCP-049 at twice the usual size insisting to "cure" nearby staff. It had numerous jellyfish-like appendages that it used to grab people and [DATA EXPUNGED]. ██ staff lost. D-5069 nowhere to be found in either booth.

Following incident 914-███, Security clearance to SCP-914 has been increased to Level 4. Anyone attempting to access it with insufficient security clearance will be terminated. Also, SCP-049 is now Keter-Class - O5-██

Intake: SCP-087-1

Setting: Coarse.

Output: A blackman.

"Give him chicken. Now." ~Dr. Humpaeertis

Input: SCP-087-3 (the smile)

Setting: Very Fine.

Output: A glaring face. Staff who looked at it experienced major cases of hysteria and psychological trauma, similar to the effects caused by SCP-895.

Maybe we should put it inside SCP-895? - Dr. Harp

Intake: SCP-038

Setting: 1:1

Output: A tree of a different species. Had the same effect as SCP-038.
Intake Booth: 1 Venus Flytrap and SCP-682 on very fine.

Output: SCP-682 and Venus flytrap both intact. The Venus flytrap had suddenly gained the ability to mutate and adapt itself to all presented situations, including extending its stem to reach a fly that was 5 feet above it and devouring 2 Class D personnel who were assigned to uproot it. SCP-682 had suddenly acquired an appetite for flies.

Input: An unhinged door.
Setting: Fine.

Output: A door with hinges. The hinges were not connected to any object.
Intake Booth: 1 SCP-1000 instance on fine.

Output: An SK-Class Dominance Shift. SCP Foundation now run by the species humans call "Bigfoot." Humans reclassified as SCP-1000. Future tests to be carried out by the new dominant species.

Input: Instance of the new SCP-1000, Fine

Output: An evolution of Homo Sapiens, classified SCP-[DATA EXPUNGED] . Subject showed significant increases in the rate of which knowledge is gained and understood, at the cost of the loss of all knowledge and memory prior to SCP-914 modification. Approximately 6 hours after modification, SCP-[DATA EXPUNGED] proceeded to refer to himself Homo Ingenium. Recommend use by Bigfoot Researchers to assert control over main SCP-1000 population.

This one is smart. Pray he understands us. ~Dr. Snowhide

Addendum 1000-732-J : 72 hours after modification, SCP-[DATA EXPUNGED] was given access to a compact supercomputer, several crates of assorted hardware, and [REDACTED]. 6 hours later, Subject proceeded to start a riot in Site-[REDACTED] resulting in a full site lockdown.

Addendum 1000-732-L : Riot has erupted in to a full scale battle between SCP-1000 and Bigfoot Researchers. Despite the intensity, all actions remain concealed from the public for now. Site-[REDACTED] now securely in SCP-1000 hands; However, SCP-[DATA EXPUNGED] was severely wounded the the chaos. Despite 0.1% percent chance of survival after 1 hour, immediate medical attention is strongly advised.

About BLOODY time! I've been O-5 for TOO long to be reduced to a test subject! ~SCP-1000-097